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"Violetta Ilkiw came to Earthaven about once a month for a weekend over a period of almost a year in
2014, with her colleague, Alex Bulkin, to help us process very difficult community conflicts. Her
presence, clarity, forthrightness and compassion impressed people significantly at a time when folks felt a
lot of hopelessness and it was difficult to come together. She and Alex worked individually, with small
groups and with our large group. The courage, apparent confidence and good humor she brought, along
with a seriousness of purpose helped people feel safe and so they showed up!
It was such a hard time that it would not have been possible for Violetta and Alex to tell what effect their
work was having on us. We were not an easy group to handle, although there were no fist fights or serious
name-calling. But there was so much anger, resentment, confusion and mistrust! However, people got to
experience each other in the throes of our trauma in ways we never would have had the opportunity to do
without Violetta’s help. As I recall, Violetta was particularly good at setting boundaries for us, questioning our
commitment and intentions at times, and staying in the fray! She was greeted and (I hope) treated with much love and
there was sadness when we knew her time with us was over, both because we'd have loved her to come live
with us and because we would then be on our own again. Too bad she lives so far away!
Nowadays, when we've survived the worst of it (it seems) and are into reconstructing ourselves as a
community, Violetta and Alex are mentioned, sometimes specific sessions we had, with clear recall and
appreciation for helping us stay in the fire. I'm sure we would turn to her again if we decided outside
support of her caliber was what we needed. "
-Founder, Earthaven
2014, with her colleague, Alex Bulkin, to help us process very difficult community conflicts. Her
presence, clarity, forthrightness and compassion impressed people significantly at a time when folks felt a
lot of hopelessness and it was difficult to come together. She and Alex worked individually, with small
groups and with our large group. The courage, apparent confidence and good humor she brought, along
with a seriousness of purpose helped people feel safe and so they showed up!
It was such a hard time that it would not have been possible for Violetta and Alex to tell what effect their
work was having on us. We were not an easy group to handle, although there were no fist fights or serious
name-calling. But there was so much anger, resentment, confusion and mistrust! However, people got to
experience each other in the throes of our trauma in ways we never would have had the opportunity to do
without Violetta’s help. As I recall, Violetta was particularly good at setting boundaries for us, questioning our
commitment and intentions at times, and staying in the fray! She was greeted and (I hope) treated with much love and
there was sadness when we knew her time with us was over, both because we'd have loved her to come live
with us and because we would then be on our own again. Too bad she lives so far away!
Nowadays, when we've survived the worst of it (it seems) and are into reconstructing ourselves as a
community, Violetta and Alex are mentioned, sometimes specific sessions we had, with clear recall and
appreciation for helping us stay in the fire. I'm sure we would turn to her again if we decided outside
support of her caliber was what we needed. "
-Founder, Earthaven
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